Sacred Cows

Don't just recycle...

~By Anu. I am an ebay junkie. Yes, I admit it... I have dragged my newborn son down airless subterannean internet cafes... stayed up until my eyes were pin-drops... even phoned friends to bid for me when the clock was ticking (can you say that anymore) on a coveted item. I once bought back all the toys my parents gave away when we moved cross-country when I was 9-years-old. I take the feedback seriously. Last year, I bought a fake Chinese made North Face jacket on ebay and then spent months trying to get my money back (don't trust ebay or paypal on this... you're largely on your own.)

But while ebay is good for profitably recycling things... there's another, local, even more satisfying way to get those odds and ends you need: Freecycle.

This year, I've given away my old cordless phone, bathroom sink, car steering lock, automatic cat feeder and 20 cement garden pavers - to people who were grateful to receive them. And in return, I've received gorgeous pond plants, a brand new water butt with stand (costs $150 new) and sailboat-shaped sandboxes. Free.

It's a win-win situation, and one that keeps clutter out of landfills.

Still, the stuff I Freecycled is pretty boring compared to what's on offer in my area: Anatomical models, Chinese vases, plastic sheeting, "skirt, size 8, black lightweight lacey pattern. Rather dressy."

Here was one message that told a tale:

"i have just found out i am expecting my third baby not planned even a little bit. i have a few bits a bobs but my son is only 8months old and a lot of what we have he will still need. please can any one help."

And this one: "does anybody have a dark purple paint to paint my daughters bedroom?
thanks" (This one made me snigger: "Weird offer I know, but have two pairs of rubber gloves which are too big so won't get used. Are size Large.

Any takers?"

Or this wonderful suggestion:

"A pleasant good day/eve!  I would like a suitcase, if anyone has one they no longer need, as long as it has some life left in it, I would greatly appreciate it, and when I get back, an idea could be to put a sticker of where I have been and repost on freecycle, so the case can travel on it's journeys!! :)
Thank you"

If you subscribe to Freecycle in your area, not only do you come to appreciate how much STUFF we collect, but how much you can reuse... how much you don't need... and certainly don't need to buy. There are appliances, children's clothes and toys on offer, furniture, books, DVDs, computers, cosmetics, even teabags (why not?)

There are serial Freecyclers, those who seem to be seeking or offering multiples things each day (sometimes I wonder if they aren't just lonely and this is a good way to meet new people, however briefly), and there are those wonderful coincidences, like when you go to collect something, and the woman who opens the door is someone you got chatting to on a bus a few weeks ago... or your local GP!

"What Mothers Do" -- it's all a blur!

Those of you with children will appreciate the irony: For 4 months, I've been trying to review a book called, "What Mothers Do (especially when it looks like nothing)" by British psychotherapist Naomi Stadlen. Each time I've had a moment free, I've decided it would be more productive to shower, or eat, or run into the garden for 10 minutes of exercise and fresh air... or just sleep... or do the shopping/laundry/tidying/bills...

    The only reason I'm sitting here now is that a friend's 17-year-old daughter was looking for a job, so I've hired her twice a week to watch the baby. This is her first day. I've been giddy with the anticipation of having some of my freedom again and have had to seriously temper my expectations. I managed to eat a cooked breakfast and read the first half of the paper. But otherwise, I haven't been able to switch off from baby-mode at all. In fact, I've been hovering over the 17-year-old all day!

    Here's a blurb from Naomi's book: "Have you ever spent all day looking after your baby or young child - and ended up feeling that you have 'done nothing all day'? Do you sometimes find it hard to feel pleased with what you are doing, and tell yourself you should achieve more with your time?

Maybe it's because you can't see how much you are doing already."

At the end of a day at my previous job with the BBC, I could point to a radio program, already broadcast, as evidence of my work. There was even a feedback session from the boss to sum up our daily successes and failures neatly. Now, after a full day at home with my seven month old son, my husband comes home and says, 'So, what have you guys been doing all day?' and my answer is inevitably, 'Oh nothing...'